Mega-serial - III

...you watch some hindi mega-serial. Almost all the male characters in all the serials are businessmen. And the ladies are the wives of such rich businessmen. They have no other identity. The ladies are always dressed like they are ready to attend a wedding. They wake up in the morning and lo, you see properly made-up face. The sarees are designer wear. All of them are home, taking care of the family. They are either
a. nice bahus (daughter-in-law) who suffer at the hands of the bad saas (mother-in-law) or
b. bad bahus scheming to destroy the good saas
And there is probably a rule that all these in-laws are supposed to sit in the living room all the time. They sit comfortably on the sofa/couch and once in a while get up saying "Kya?" or "nahiiiiiin" or "bilkul nahin".
(Whatever happened to the people that gave us Dekh Bhai Dekh or Tu Tu Mein mein?!!)
There is not much role for men in these tamil or hindi mega-serials. And the ones that act as fathers, uncles or fathers-in-law are the ones that have the most insignificant of roles.
I am so ready to pen a mega-serial. There is a template. Make the lead woman cry every alternate day. Introduce new characters every other day. Make sure the main family and these side families don't meet. The more you postpone this, the longer the serial gets. A few good characters that are close to the lead woman should die. Finally, somehow link all the characters/families and the lead woman wins (whatever).

THE END.

Mega-serial - II

that I have time, I decided to blog about it. Yes, sometime ago he had wanted to write about this. But he got busy with his life. So I am on this mission now.

There is nothing wrong with the concept of mega-serial. I am a big fan of some of them "Chitthi", "Everybody Loves Raymond", "Seinfeld" to name a few. The indoctrination happened when I saw a mega-serial called Junoon. It was dubbed in tamil as well. Entire Chennai started talking that way - "Naan sonnen aamaam nu", "Naan panna maatten allow". All the words in a sentence were jumbled somehow. The writers of that serial introduced so many characters that they didn't know where the story was going. So it ended abruptly with the cast saying "We'd be back" a la Arnold. And the rest is history. I think tamil producers saw an opportunity there and then came "Vizhudhugal" in DD. I think it met with the same fate. I am not sure if it ended properly. (Input please)

As cable TV became more popular, mega-serial industry started booming. The writers take the viewers for granted. Dialogues like "Ponna petthuttomey pa..", "oru ponnu nenaccha...", "Ellatthayum kuduttha Aandavan..." come in all the serials. The cast is also almost the same. So its very difficult to keep track of the storyline. It takes a lot of intelligence, concentration and observation skills to tell them apart. All the out-of-market heroines like Meena, Sukanya, Devayani et al make a comeback on small screen. And some even give interviews like "I find satisfaction in doing that character", "She is more like me. I see myself in her", "I am a household name now. People actually call me by that character's name" etc.

If you watch any of these tamil mega-serials and think it can't get any worse. Wait till.....
To be continued.....

Mega-serials - I

This is a hot topic I am sure. I've been wanting to write about this for a long time. Now.....

To be continued......

KANK review

My friend Bubby a.k.a Chinna Ammani is the kind of friend one prays for. She goes out of the way to do stuff for you. She'd be willing to suffer if that would make your life better. Yes, my friends, I asked her to watch KANK (she would disown me if I say Kabhi Alvida na Kehna) and send a review. She did go out of the way literally to watch it and here is her review. (I guess most of the readers of this blog can understand tamil.)

KANK - kazhutaruppu , aruvai n kadi!
- Oru paarvai

1)karan-ji : We all love our parents - We love mummy, miss daddy etc but do we go about writing this on every piece of paper we see? I miss you daddy.. I love you mummy.. idellam pada title kku munnadi tevayaaa? I thought i went for an english padam called "I miss you daddy" when i came for ur film.. paatungga! padam aarambikaradukku munnadiyee neraya per tappaana padatukku vandutooamnu ezhundu poitaangaa..kodutthu vaithavargal
Theatre la irunda 10 perla 5 per ezhundu poittanga.. 5 peroda kaali theatre la unga padam paatengaana.. adu enna annaachi! ticket book pannumbodu.. "this seat is not available, that seat is not available" nnu theatre ticket counter la oree rouse udaraanga.. theatre la irunda 10 perukku ippadi altaappu vendaam . ippadi film kaata solli instructions aa from ur end?

And before you start shooting for your films do you Soodam yetthi sathiyam pannufy infront of saami photo that your film will be 3 hours long ? [minimum duration] ... en vaazhkaila 3 hours 10 minutes waste-u saar! ungalukum Ekta kapoor kkum bayangara poattti-a? ava serial- a izhukkara.. neenga padatha ippadi javvvvvvvvvvvu muttai madiri izukkareenga

And saar.. We have heard this "pyaar kab mohabbat hota hein... mohabbat aur dosti kab ishq hotee hein... pyaar dosti nahin..." pondra international dialogues a billion times before in your movies wonly.. dialaak-a maathuda deei

2 Congrajulasions costume director manish-ji for inventing a new type of saree - the saree which rani mugarjee wears in the film, the POONAL SAREE.. you must have heard of a gujju type saree, south indian saree, bihari style saree etc.. this is different. this is a POONAL SAREE.. how else would you call a saree worn like a Poonal? ennamo pongappa! manish -saar.. unga ooru 30,000 rooba saaree enga oorla Poonal-aa 30 roobakku 2 kedaikkudu saar!

3) In the 70s and early 80 s it was Nirupa roy, then came Reema Lagoo in late 80s and 90s.. Presenting Kiran kher, the hindi movie mummy of the new millennium..Now there is major competition on screen between Kiran kher and preeti jinta [who play maamiyar and marumagal] on who opens their bajji vaai bigger. Neeya Naana..Both with their bajji vaais and the same pulicchu pona ishq, wafaadaar, mohabbat, khatir etc kinda dialaaks..Tirundungadaa deeei

4) saaruk kaan-ji : inda oru film la mattundaan you have the look perfect and you look your age.
ofcourse, ur acting is the same. i have a sincere suggestion. Why do you waste ur time and energy running from one location to another giving those shots? let ur co-artistes be filmed as per script.Your shots from ur earlier films can be cut and paste.. ade kai-virippu [ungallukku pana patraakuraiyaa? en rendu kaiyayum ivvalavu virichi pichai edukareenga?] , ade mukki mukki azhugai [ ungalluku constipation aa?]..
My friend who had accompanied me for the film , throughout, was telling me that Shahrukh's look in the film reminded her of something and towards the end she said "Gnabagam vandaachchu! Saaruk resembles an azhugina vadumaangaaaaaa" Right! take a closer look! saaruk really resembles an azhugina vadumaangaa!

5) ranee mugarjee-ji: If preeti jinta wears those tight dress etc thats coz she is a high profile fashion magazine editor blah blah.. But did you really have to show off your gundu kaai with those sleevless salwars and off-shoulder gowns where ur sadhai pidungi vazhinjifyes? sad! We want the Rani from Paheli, Black, bunty aur babli.. And ur watch ur makeup ma'am! Neenga Newyork la poatta makeup inga Mumbai varikkum varudu!

6) Abhisek annachi : paavam ungala jaalra poda vittututaanga!! paravalla.. konjam nallave nadichirukkenga.. please change ur stylist! ade 'bluff master' look.. ungalluku role-e kammi.. adanala ungala pathi inda post-um kammidaan

7) pretti madam : neenga toongumbodu kooda high heels la daan toonguveengala padathulla?
seri anda disco paatula, avvalavu kuttai skirt, high heels pottundu kaala tooki aadalainnu yaaravadu azhudaangala? romba kashtappattu dance aada try pannirukka vendam.. and madam, 'Salaam namaste' padathula konjam slim aa irundeenga.. adukkunnu adula potta maadiriye dress idulayumaa? Sadai pidungi vazhiyidu.. paatukunga!

8) TK: Free! Ilavasam! muft! Oru payyan cast pannaal appa ilavasam!! udane mundungal! Offer available still stock lasts ! Inda amitabh bachchanukku enna aachu? he plays sexy sam who @ thondu kezham [TK)vayasu is gilpaansing with women.. and flirts with kiran kher, who is saaruk's mother in the film.. and even passes remarks about kiran kher's body and kiran medam is like "Uffoo! sam! tu hamesha aisa hai" They are NRI punjus you see.. very 'broad minded'.. kashta kaalam! Everytime TK comes on screen, you want to just slap him.. He is terribly artificial, as always and trying to be cool.. yo man types.. and ofcourse he does utter his "mohabbat ki khaatir ki ishq ki zulfon ki bahon mein " kinda dialaaks before mandaya pottufying ! taangalada saami..
http://lordlabak.blogspot.com/2006/06/total-trash.html la comments section la naa sonna madiriye nadandadu with respect to TK.. karan jogar en idea va copy adichutaanee.. adappavee

9)Shankar - ehsaan -Loy : Did ur brief to the songs composition go like this from karan jogar?
" A song with fast beats and some balle balle beats for aam junta /NRI s to play during their shaadis.. A party song for Mumbai/Delhi kids to dance during their birthday parties, A title track with Sonu nigam where he mukki mukki sings [Sonu-ji ungallukum vayitru koLaraa?]and yes, the title track should be an hour long , one duet song sounding similar to the title track , one song for saaruk kaan where he can virichify his kai.."
Unga paatellam bayangara repetitive.. boring

10) cameraman anil mehata avargale : neenga padam panna shots ellam paata NY ore kuppaya irukkum pola irukkeee? eppa parthalaum Dry leaves parandu poramadiri .. last-a count pannapodu oru 20 times ade kamichaanga..

11) Tundu beedis : how despo can people get to be part of a Karan jogar filim? Arjun rampal is on screen for egggjactly 30 seconds , john abragam for 11 seconds and kajol for 2 seconds.. I say, even the guy who says "Saar post!" in all Doordarshan Tuesday dramas has a better role.
Dei.. alpangada neenga!

Anbaanaa Blog vaasargale :- If you want to pazhivaangify someone , do buy a ticket for kabhi alvida naa kehna and gift it to them.. ada vida pazhivaangara method vera eduvumee kedayadu.

And finally, Deepa avargale , unnoda guest blog ezhudaa i spent Rs 362.50 [ticket selavu dandam-180 + petrol kaasu- 62.50+ popcorn -20 + dinner -60 + driver batta / overtime -40 ]
naa kashtapattu sambaadichaa kaasa kari aakitten.. neenga inda pannata marakkama wire pannidunga ;-)

Angrily, Anonymous

There are many reasons why a person blogs. Some have interesting tales, some want to become popular, some act like journalists through their blog, some write funny stuff and some write "well". And there are a million more reasons why one blogs. Apparently, a ranking system exists as well to see who's the best. But why do I blog? I use this space as a personal online diary. I don't have a pattern to what I write here. When you write in a public domain, you are bound to be noticed and commented upon.

The real fun in every blog is in the comments section. This section provides very good entertainment for blog-hoppers. The arguments, the mud-slinging, lets face it, its fun to sit back and read all that when your mind craves for something to escape from durdgery. Comments like "Good Post", "I agree" might mean well for the blogger but thats not fun for the readers. So, to do my bit, I never moderate (whatever little) comments that appear in my blog. But in all the blogs, you often come across these Anonymous-es that are most of the time angry and rude. Remember, not all of them but most of them. Why would a person stay anonymous while commenting? I don't understand.

These angry anon-s have a one point agenda - trash what you write. Sometimes they call you names without understanding what you meant. For example, after the soccer world cup, I wrote a post that didn't say anything good about Chirac or Zidane. It was sarcastic. But an anon didn't understand and called me a fool for supporting Chirac. Supporting chirac...ha ha funny. Countering these anons is a big task and for someone like me who can't even write long posts (well, this one is the first exception I think) its out of the question. So I have a request to all these angry anons. When you do name-calling and disagree, please make your comments more credible by explaining your stance. You don't have enough time or are too much of a wimp to leave your name (by the way, what will happen if your name is known?), so make your stance clear or let your point of view be known, if not for the blogger's sake, at least for the blog-hopper's sake. That way, the readers know that angry anons actually mean something and have an opinion, right or wrong.

When jill becomes chill

Karunanidhi came up with this brilliant idea of giving tax-break to movies that have "thamizh" names. We have come to a point where tax benefits need to be given to make tamil directors name their tamil movies in tamil. Our CM must be one heart-broken person. If he decides to give tax benefits to people who give tamil names to their kids, our dear CM won't qualify. And even his father wouldn't qualify.

I'll leave him alone. I am sure he has good intentions. But the producers of the movie Jillendru oru kadhal changed the name of their movie to Chill nu oru kadhal to avail the tax benefits. But whoever told them chill is tamil? I am reminded of a drama by S.Ve.Sekhar where a politician refuses to say "satthiyamaaga" because its not a tamil word. He claims its a "vada mozhi chol". When asked how he'd say that in tamil, he goes "Promise aaga..". S.Ve is clairvoyant. Guess he knew this was coming.

Tamil is the only language whose spoken form is entirely different from its pure form. Sure, every language has slangs and words that are not "pure" but not every word would be different. Someone (a non-tamil) who learns tamil from some University wouldn't understand a word if you speak to him like you speak everyday. The tamilians born in the last 100 years are the ones to be blamed, I would think. There is no going back from here. Thats why you see jill get tamil-ised to chill.

The Great Poet Bharathi would've sung "Nenju porukkudhillaye..." in this context.